I personally have not had the image of La Virgen Guadalupe growing up as a child. I come from an African American background, but my family was not that religious. My mother always believed in God, but she has always had difficulties in having faith in a certain religion. My grandmother was always a religious woman, she had converted to almost 4 different religions over her life. At one point she was a Buddhist, another a christian, another she practiced Judaism, another she was a Muslim, and then again, back to Judaism. She believed in all kinds of forms of faith and God, and it was hard for my mother to believe in the effects of religious faith as she grew up. So when she had me, we rarely ever went to church. At one period in my life though, we went to church all the time, but my mother was always uncomfortable. She did not like the yelling and performance that came with praising god; she felt that she could have love and and appreciation for the lord without having to be in church. So we never went back and she raised me to believe that god was alive and well, but that I could love him and pray to him in the confines of my home.
It was not until recently that I began to go back to the church. My father has come back into my life in powerful speed and now has an even stronger faith in Christianity and God. He believes that God is the reason why my brother and I are apart of his life again, and he wants us all to praise the lord for it. I attend church with him, but there are no figures that are as prevalent and impactful as La Virgen Guadalupe. The only thing close to her that has influenced my life is the bible and the Buddha. When I was younger, my grandma would take me to Chinatown in San Fransisco every week and buy me a toy. We would have the best times together, always eating candy and sharing laughs. But every morning before we left, she would make me rub the belly of a very small, very round, jade Buddha and promised me that it would bring me good luck. Of course, I believed her and would never skip a day.
Until one morning my mother caught me doing it and slapped my hand. She told me that there was nothing in rubbing the Buddha's belly that god couldn't fix with the words of the bible. She bought a very beautiful baby blue bible with a white angel on the front that was an easy read for children. So in some ways, I guess the bible was my own version of La Virgen Guadalupe because it was a symbol of hope for me.
Wow - your post gave me chills. First, I want to say that I'm so happy for you and for your brother. I am glad that your father has come back into your life and I hope that it continues that way. Like you, the Virgen wasn't a major part of my life. I was raised Catholic, but that didn't last too long. My dad was very jealous! He assumed my mom had a boyfriend/lover at the church, so he told her that she couldn't go anymore. Then, we became Jehovah's witnesses. Really, we had no say as kids - so, we had to go with my mom, but it wasn't that bad. Everyone was really nice and open-hearted, which was something that my mom needed at that time. Of course, my dad only became more jealous and we weren't Jehovah's witnesses for much longer. I remember him barging through the doors, before the service had ended, and yanking us out of the church and into the van. It was beyond embarrassing, but I can't imagine what it must have been like for my mom. Around the time I was time, my mom finally filed for divorce. Eventually, she began dating again and, in time, she married my step-dad, Jack. After a few years of not practicing any religion, we were introduced to the Christian church. I think that helped our family bond and become one unit - but, at least, for me, it didn't stick. I respect all religions and I understand how it helps individuals, families, and communities. As of late, I've been more in tune with my own spirituality - but, I've been reading more about Buddhism, as well. I don't think I will force any one religion on my future (if and when) children; instead, I'll teach them about several different religions and allow them to make a personal choice. Sorry for the novel, but I really enjoyed reading your post. It's exciting that I am able to relate, to a certain extent, in my own way.
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