Final Reflection

As I reflect on the past 10 weeks in this course, I am astonished to see how much I have grown. Not only have I learned about many Chicana artists and their work, but my mentality has also changed allowing me to get past my fear of drawing and slowly getting past my perfectionism that limits me in many aspects of my life.

I felt ashamed when asked on the first day of class to name Chicana artists that we knew of because it was very hard for me to contribute to the list. Being introduced to these inspiring mujeres has truly been an amazing experience. It is empowering to learn about women because I see a reflection of myself in them. I am grateful to not only say that I am able to identify many more artists, but understand many overarching themes and... through which to analyze Chicana artwork. 

Engaging in art myself was both nerve-recking and exciting. At the beginning I couldn't get myself to draw my hand. I remember looking at my hand and then at my paper consistently, yet not being able to get anything on my sketchbook. I don't know exactly what was stopping me; I think that it was a combination of things. 

1. I didn't want to mess up
2. I didn't think I could draw
3. I feared my own judgment as well as the judgment of other people
4. I feared failure
5. I wanted it to be perfect
6. etc. 

This class, with the help of Professor Lopez, helped me push passed everything that was stopping me. For me, even starting to draw was a big step- a sign of improvement. Once I got started, I realized that it is just a matter of starting. It may not come out just as I want it at first and that's absolutely normal, but I kept trying and working on my sketches. After all, this is a SKETCH book. After this realization and the support of the professor along with my peers, I improved a lot. I am very proud of myself and hope that I continue to move past everything that stops me from being able to do anything. 

I want to thank Professor Lopez for helping me break down the wall I built by creating a non-judgmental atmosphere, providing me with tips and reminding me that art is not as scary as I thought it was. I hope to continue drawing as a stress-reliever and form of expression. Overall, I am walking away with a lot of precious knowledge and I am extremely grateful for that.