Growing up a Chicana in Los Angeles, the image of the Virgin was part of a visual vocabulary that saturated my life. My mother was Christian and my father Catholic, so I always recognized La Virgen being a key difference between the two religions. I remember going to mass and seeing a life sized statue of La Virgen at the entrance of the chapel, as well as depictions of her on prayer cards. I felt quite ostracized by both my parents religions, and often felt that the Saints and God rejected me since my values and ideals did not align with that of the church’s. I remember feeling that if La Virgen were a person in real life she would reject me for being too secular, for not believing in her son, and for going against what was taught in the Bible. I pushed her and her image away because I felt that she would not accept me or the path I chose for my life.
It wasn’t until I took until a course with Professor Alma Lopez that she shifted the way I saw La Virgen. While reading her book “Our Lady of Controversy”, I remember Alma stating how she felt that the Virgen supported revolutionary movements as well as the Chicana female struggle. That made me imagine a Holy being whose views aligned with mine, who used their presence for the causes I was passionate about, even if it wasn’t necessarily laid out that way in the Bible. Since then, I see the Virgin in a very different way. I feel that perhaps if she was here in Los Angeles with me, she would accompany me in my activist efforts, supporting me and blessing me instead of pushing me away. When I think of her in this way I feel close to her. I feel like “Of course she would support my plight as a Chicana, she probably had the same struggles as me.” Now, whenever I drive around the city I look for her. I love capturing her image on tienditas that I pass, liquor stores, alleyways and wherever else she might appear. I take her image as a reminder to stay strong in my beliefs and to keep pushing for the world I want to see.
No comments:
Post a Comment