F2015RuizEsperanza

My name is Esperanza Ruiz; I am in my second year at UCLA as a transfer student from Santa Ana.  I'm a fourth year Econ major and minoring in Chicana/o studies, which I am very grateful to be taking these courses here at UCLA. As these courses provide me a release from the oversimplified computational theory offered in my Econ courses. As for this class I am overly excited about having the opportunity to produce artwork in the journals. I have always been drawn to the arts and have a long time ago attempted to express my own perspectives of life through sketches, but as I got older and became more aware of my responsibilities toward my family my sketching came to a halt. So I am really looking forward to the projects and the creativity that may come out of these projects.

A little bit on my background. I am second generation immigrant from Mexican parents who met in California then married.  Growing up my parents worked a lot, they worked weekends and all shifts, which meant that we did not go to many family gatherings. Growing up we were isolated from our relatives, and not having any connections to the Mexican community left us, my sisters and I, with very little knowledge of our families traditions and values as we ended up raising ourselves. I wasn't aware of how much this hurt me until my daughter was born. Although I may not have much personal experiences and relationships with my extended family, I feel that the material and history that I gather from my Chicana/o studies helps me feel closer to them. It's provided me the strength to belong and to open up to a community, and above all it’s helping my daughter and I piece together a personal history.

As for the ubiquitous apparitions of the Virgin de Guadalupe in the Mexican community I would like to add that I admire the love and the devotion that she symbolizes. She embodies unconditional love, and her legend only strengthens her active stance to protect her children. Yet I also feel that she is taken too literal by the pious followers that portray her as a saint and causes a drift to those who would benefit from worshiping her on a personal level. I believe that people bring her closer by adorning and creating her alters; tattooing her image; or even creating her a prose. These are all creative outlets that keep her closer, alive and credible. I firmly believe that she belongs to the people and not to the rigid interpretations offered by the Catholic Church.